OHbaby! Forums : Choosing sex? https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ Copyright (c) 2006-2013 Web Wiz Forums - All Rights Reserved. Sat, 04 Apr 2026 06:05:35 +0000 Thu, 26 Jun 2008 15:59:44 +0000 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Web Wiz Forums 12.04 360 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/RSS_post_feed.asp?TID=18383 <![CDATA[OHbaby! Forums]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_images/web_wiz_forums.png https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I also think it wrong. We went...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=424777&title=choosing-sex#424777 Author: kiwigal
Subject: 18383
Posted: 26 June 2008 at 3:59pm

I also think it wrong. We went through IUI and asked our specialist if you can choose the sex of the baby and he said they can get done for malpractice.

At the end of the day it shouldn't matter if it was a boy or a girl as long he/she is healthy.

]]> Thu, 26 Jun 2008 15:59:44 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=424777&title=choosing-sex#424777 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I&#039;m not &#034;for&#034; it...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=423764&title=choosing-sex#423764 Author: mandz
Subject: 18383
Posted: 25 June 2008 at 5:40pm

I'm not "for" it as such, but I don't have an issue with couples who wish to do it as part of IVF. I have a little boy who I love more than anything, but next time around I really hope I have a girl! However whatever we are blessed with will be loved unconditionally so I wouldn't personally go down that road.

I am with Jess, I wouldn't judge someone who chose to do it.

Amanda]]> Wed, 25 Jun 2008 17:40:08 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=423764&title=choosing-sex#423764 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : im ok with ivf parents being able...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=423513&title=choosing-sex#423513 Author: Candkids
Subject: 18383
Posted: 25 June 2008 at 2:20pm

im ok with ivf parents being able to choose the sex. but im SOOOOOOO against the designer baby thing tho, thats stepping way over the line.]]> Wed, 25 Jun 2008 14:20:23 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=423513&title=choosing-sex#423513 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I am totally against it. I agree...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=421266&title=choosing-sex#421266 Author: Kels
Subject: 18383
Posted: 23 June 2008 at 5:39pm

I am totally against it. I agree with what Fiona said.

]]> Mon, 23 Jun 2008 17:39:30 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=421266&title=choosing-sex#421266 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I wouldn/t personally do it but...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=421188&title=choosing-sex#421188 Author: NeoshasMummy
Subject: 18383
Posted: 23 June 2008 at 4:35pm

I wouldn/t personally do it but in saying that I wouldn't judge someone who did make that decision.]]> Mon, 23 Jun 2008 16:35:48 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=421188&title=choosing-sex#421188 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I worked on a research project...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=421146&title=choosing-sex#421146 Author: Mazzy
Subject: 18383
Posted: 23 June 2008 at 3:57pm

I worked on a research project on this topic, it was really interesting to see people's opinions and made me think hard about what I thought about it all. I was working on it while pregnant with DD1 so it really struck home with me!

For a lot of people it comes down to where you consider life to start - is that little embryo or blastocyst a life or not?

Personally, my gut tells me I'm against choosing gender. I guess my view is if it isn't broken, don't fix it. Even for those going through IVF for fertility reasons, I don't think it should be allowed - then there are all sorts of arguments about why some are allowed it when others aren't. I don't like the idea of manipulation when it comes to procreation. I think IVF is a blessing for those with fertility problems, but mixed up in that is the knowledge that unused embryos are destroyed, like Ginger talked about.

I can see the logic and benefit behind allowing gender selection for genetic medical conditions, but also can't see how it can have boundaries put on it to be fair, so think it probably shouldn't happen.

Muh. I can't form my thoughts properly today, I will come back later when I have a better brain! ]]> Mon, 23 Jun 2008 15:57:03 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=421146&title=choosing-sex#421146 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : i think sex selection should be...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=421076&title=choosing-sex#421076 Author: rorylex
Subject: 18383
Posted: 23 June 2008 at 3:25pm

i think sex selection should be allowed to couples who are going through ivf for infertility reasons most of them proberbly arnt bothered about sex anyway,
however i dont think couples should be able to go through ivf just for sex selection.
though after 3 boys it is tempting but id still be happy if i had 6 boys. me and dp talked about it and we thought it would cost 10-20k just to do ivf for that much we could of had 3 more kids and 1 might of been a girl. id rather have 3 more boys than pay so much for the possible girl]]> Mon, 23 Jun 2008 15:25:04 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=421076&title=choosing-sex#421076 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : i think designer babies are just...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=418143&title=choosing-sex#418143 Author: Candkids
Subject: 18383
Posted: 20 June 2008 at 8:53pm

i think designer babies are just outright wrong!!!!

but

i think choosing the sex for ivf babies is ok only as i have a friend , he has 6 brothers the last 2 were ivf and finally his mum had a girl she was sooooooo over the moon.
their little girl died in an accident, it was heartwrenching for all of them.

]]> Fri, 20 Jun 2008 20:53:32 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=418143&title=choosing-sex#418143 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : Apparently in countries that do...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417333&title=choosing-sex#417333 Author: Jennz
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 9:07pm

Apparently in countries that do allow it the majority use it to 'conceive' a girl which I thought was interesting. I also think it would be a slippery slope and it does seem like messing with nature a bit too much- but then again, if I had of had boys I think I would quite possibly be looking into it to get a girl. Actually, to be totally honest, I know I would have without a doubt. I desperately desperately wanted a girl at some point and I remember being so so relieved that Charlotte was a girl, it meant I didn't have to 'worry' about not having one.

So what about people who design babies to help a sick sibling? I'm reading 'My sisters keeper' at the moment and its really really interesting seeing the situation from the child POV. I always thought it was horrid, then I had kids and realised I would do anything to save them- but then again it seems so cruel for the spare part child.]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 21:07:59 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417333&title=choosing-sex#417333 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I totally agree with Fiona&#039;s...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417273&title=choosing-sex#417273 Author: Bobbie
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 8:34pm

I totally agree with Fiona's comment. It is a slippery slope.
May be an extreme but I keep thinking of the movie Gattaca.

The problem is that the UK and the US already allow it (so they said in the news) so I think it's just a matter of time before it becomes commonplace.]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 20:34:02 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417273&title=choosing-sex#417273 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : PS. Even as I am about to give...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417261&title=choosing-sex#417261 Author: Maya
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 8:26pm

PS. Even as I am about to give birth to my fourth wee girl, I can't honestly say I'd be keen on gender selection should I have any more babies.]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 20:26:39 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417261&title=choosing-sex#417261 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I&#039;m not comfy with the playing...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417255&title=choosing-sex#417255 Author: Maya
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 8:23pm

I'm not comfy with the playing God aspect either. I can see the merits in cases where there are certain gender-specific genetic conditions, but then where do you draw the line between what conditions qualify? Does a family history of breast cancer justify only selecting a male embryo "just in case" or is it only OK in the case of major, life-affecting, definite genetic conditions like haemophilia. And since it's possible to test an for those genetic conditions without testing the gender...

I'm with whoever said it's a slippery slope... ]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 20:23:13 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417255&title=choosing-sex#417255 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I personally don&#039;t agree...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417234&title=choosing-sex#417234 Author: Paws
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 8:03pm

I personally don't agree with it, while I see IVF as an amazing blessing that can give people like ginger the child they have dreamed of, I feel the same as Fiona, it's playing God far too much for my liking.

]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 20:03:00 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417234&title=choosing-sex#417234 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I&#039;m actaully all for it -...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417193&title=choosing-sex#417193 Author: yummymummy
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 7:29pm

I'm actaully all for it - if you're paying for IVF, why not have the option to choose the sex? I don't think it will create an imbalance in society as not many couples undergo IVF and most of those (like Ginger) probably wouldn't care to take up the option. However, if say a couple with 5 boys want a girl and are willing to go thru IVF, I don't see why it shouldn't be an option.
Ok I'm dunking now ]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 19:29:11 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417193&title=choosing-sex#417193 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : Well said Fiona Exactly what...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417070&title=choosing-sex#417070 Author: Snickerdoodle
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 5:14pm

Well said Fiona

Exactly what I was going for, I'm just not as eloquent ]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 17:14:16 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=417070&title=choosing-sex#417070 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I totally disagree with it, in...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416995&title=choosing-sex#416995 Author: FionaS
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 3:28pm

I totally disagree with it, in part, because I definately view it as a slippery slope towards other types of engineering. Playing God has too many far reaching consequences. Gender is not an illness so why treat it as such? We run the risk of all kinds of unplanned ramifications as a society as a whole.]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 15:28:58 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416995&title=choosing-sex#416995 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I don&#039;t like the idea of...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416935&title=choosing-sex#416935 Author: MrsMojo
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:49pm

I don't like the idea of designer babies at all.  I think it's wrong.

Originally posted by MamaPickle MamaPickle wrote:

I just don't like the though that, for any of those selections, you have to make a bunch of embryos to choose from, so you know right from the word go that you are making life only to dispose of it if it doesn't fit what you want, and being the wrong gender is a really frivolous reason to do that, I think.

I agree with this


Originally posted by ginger ginger wrote:


And yes, that's a really good point. It's difficult knowing that you have embryos who will possibly be destroyed - it's still life in my opinion (eg. I have 5 embryos, and if our next FET works first time, we will be in a position where 4 will be destroyed).

I'd hate to be in that position.  I could just imagine myself taking out an extra mortgage to pay for IVF 5 more times to give all my ice babies a chance. 

Maybe you could just insert them all in one go and try to have quintuplets next time around

]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 13:49:40 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416935&title=choosing-sex#416935 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : It&#039;s WRONG.... How can we...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416926&title=choosing-sex#416926 Author: LJsmum
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:27pm

It's WRONG.... How can we decide what gender should be born. It's just too scary to mess with creation.

Just my opinion but nope can't believe it would/ could happen!]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 13:27:16 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416926&title=choosing-sex#416926 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I think its wrong. Well thats...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416924&title=choosing-sex#416924 Author: Roksana
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:22pm

I think its wrong. Well thats JMO

I really want a boy this time but if it is a girl I would love her to death. For me...its my child, my flesh and blood...doesnt matter what gender.

But again JMO.]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 13:22:57 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416924&title=choosing-sex#416924 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : MamaPickle wrote:eta: I just...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416914&title=choosing-sex#416914 Author: ginger
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:04pm

Originally posted by MamaPickle MamaPickle wrote:

eta: I just don't like the though that, for any of those selections, you have to make a bunch of embryos to choose from, so you know right from the word go that you are making life only to dispose of it if it doesn't fit what you want, and being the wrong gender is a really frivolous reason to do that, I think.


And yes, that's a really good point. It's difficult knowing that you have embryos who will possibly be destroyed - it's still life in my opinion (eg. I have 5 embryos, and if our next FET works first time, we will be in a position where 4 will be destroyed). We're in the position where we may have to make that decision because we have no other choice - I can't imagine choosing to be in that position for something so, as you say, frivilous!, as to choosing a boy or girl. And what if all your embryos were one sex, the opposite to what you wanted????]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 13:04:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416914&title=choosing-sex#416914 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : There would be huge problems in...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416913&title=choosing-sex#416913 Author: AliaDawn
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:02pm

There would be huge problems in countries that favor one gender - china for example is already having problems with more boys than girls, and that's only from the people who are willing to go through less than legal means to do so, or at the least less than moral.

I'm with ginger, except I didn't have to go through IVF of course, but I'll be perfectly happy with whatever gender I get.

Edited by AliaDawn]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 13:02:12 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416913&title=choosing-sex#416913 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : MamaPickle wrote:Yeah, I would...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416912&title=choosing-sex#416912 Author: ginger
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 1:00pm

Originally posted by MamaPickle MamaPickle wrote:

Yeah, I would be interested from an IVF recipient's point of view.


To be honest, I can absolutely say that for myself, I have been through so much, and fought so hard to have a child, that even if they'd given me the option I wouldn't have taken it. I want a child so much, and gender means nothing. Whether our child is a boy or a girl, it'll be it's own special person. I can't imagine choosing not to have the child I'll have ... does that make sense?

I think you'll find that the majority of people who must go through IVF would choose not to be there, and just want a child, boy or girl. For us, life and health are all that matter.

I'm not for it.]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 13:00:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416912&title=choosing-sex#416912 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : Yeah, I would be interested from...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416905&title=choosing-sex#416905 Author: Snickerdoodle
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 12:52pm

Yeah, I would be interested from an IVF recipient's point of view.

I agree with your comment about not hurting anyone else.
But I just feel there could be adverse repercussions from it.
What if 90% or people choose girls, for example.
There would be a complete imbalance in gender population.

eta: I just don't like the though that, for any of those selections, you have to make a bunch of embryos to choose from, so you know right from the word go that you are making life only to dispose of it if it doesn't fit what you want, and being the wrong gender is a really frivolous reason to do that, I think.


Edited by MamaPickle]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 12:52:01 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416905&title=choosing-sex#416905 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : I have no problem with people...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416902&title=choosing-sex#416902 Author: Mikaela
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 12:48pm

I have no problem with people who go through IVF choosing the sex. I fail to see how it hurts anyone else.

Also, the story in the Herald was calling it 'Who Gets Born' which I think is too emotive. It implies abortion based on gender (which obviously I'm extremely opposed to, I think most people would be), rather than just choosing one blastocyst over another before transferring it to the uterus. A blastocyst isn't a 'real' baby because otherwise unused embryos couldn't be disposed of after IVF treatment had finished. So the way they're talking about it at the moment is a bit of a double standard.

Someone - Mellybelly? Ginger? - who has done IVF will know way more about this than me, I'm just going on my fairly limited understanding.]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 12:48:15 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416902&title=choosing-sex#416902 <![CDATA[Choosing sex? : OK, this is a little bit of an...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416897&title=choosing-sex#416897 Author: Snickerdoodle
Subject: 18383
Posted: 19 June 2008 at 12:42pm

OK, this is a little bit of an inflammatory subject, I'm sure..
But I'm interested in people's opinions.

This is today's front page story...

I'm pro natural selection. I don't feel people should be able to choose.
UNLESS it's for medical reasons.
ie: Breast cancer runs in your family, so you'd want a boy.
But then, what's to say he won't get prostate cancer later in life..
It's such a hard one

I absolutely draw the line at designer babies though.

Opinions? ]]> Thu, 19 Jun 2008 12:42:19 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18383&PID=416897&title=choosing-sex#416897