https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ Copyright (c) 2006-2013 Web Wiz Forums - All Rights Reserved. Tue, 21 Apr 2026 22:34:23 +0000 Thu, 12 May 2011 22:06:24 +0000 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Web Wiz Forums 12.04 360 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/RSS_post_feed.asp?TID=38382 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_images/web_wiz_forums.png https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1324770&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1324770 Author: busymum
Subject: 38382
Posted: 12 May 2011 at 10:06pm

Yea I had similar with #4 when #5 came along. I found I had to put her in her room every single time for a good couple of weeks - and my DD4 is younger than your DS so he might need it for longer, unfortunately. I feel your pain! ]]> Thu, 12 May 2011 22:06:24 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1324770&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1324770 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1324726&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1324726 Author: readyforanother?
Subject: 38382
Posted: 12 May 2011 at 9:25pm

Wow! All you yellers, I know what you mean. I feel horrible about it as I feel I'm yelling all the time! I'm thinking I need to return to work and put them both in Daycare for all of our sanity, though I feel bad as my little guy hasn't had as much time at home with mummy.

edited- hoping sig will show

Edited by Psycho mum]]> Thu, 12 May 2011 21:25:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1324726&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1324726 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1315870&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1315870 Author: erinalba
Subject: 38382
Posted: 01 May 2011 at 7:18am

Oh Alex, this sounds so much like my two. Unfortunately I haven't found the answer yet. I've also become one of those mums that yells at my kids all the time and I hate it.]]> Sun, 01 May 2011 07:18:02 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1315870&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1315870 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1309903&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1309903 Author: ElfsMum
Subject: 38382
Posted: 20 April 2011 at 1:07pm

Ethan never once tried to hurt him when he was little but now he's getting bigger he does ..mostly he pushes him over cause he wants to he tells me..but he also spends 70% of the time being nice to him...so that's good...

for us i used to just tell him off or give him time out in the room we were in but that didn't work so now he goes in his room.... i dont like time out in cots but he is in bed so tis all good now and he just goes in there for everyone to calm down... and i make a big deal of Liam as well..having said thatLiam hits back sometimes now too and i have to make sure i tell Liam off too lol....

anyway hugs... if you want a break anytime come over!!:) i never yell unless things get very bad and that helps for us cause he's not getting all that attention..but thats mostly pre school training ...lol... anyway i hope he grows out of it soon! ]]> Wed, 20 Apr 2011 13:07:10 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1309903&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1309903 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1309768&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1309768 Author: woodsa
Subject: 38382
Posted: 20 April 2011 at 10:12am

Hi there,
I noticed your comment about being told that you have become the mum that yells at thier kids all the time, ME TOO! It really upsets me actually, my Mum said the same thing to me a month ago. I really dont want to yell all the time, but my 2 year old is driving me mental too! It hard because I love him so much, and he is so sweet, but sometimes (80% of the time at the moment!!) he just doesnt listen and seems to get into as much trouble as possible. Everyone keeps telling me its a phase, but I feel like if I were a 'better' mum I could help him behave better. I use time out, and try pretty much anything that is suggested. It is getting me down, because I feel like I am constantly complaining about him, when really I am lucky to have him!!! I never realised how guilty you can feel being a mum!! Anyway just needed to rant, and say that I am in the same boat as you!
]]> Wed, 20 Apr 2011 10:12:53 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1309768&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1309768 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1299493&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1299493 Author: gypsynita
Subject: 38382
Posted: 04 April 2011 at 7:38pm

I put my toddler in his room too, with no time limit though - he just knows that he's not allowed to come out unless he apologises or is ready to do whatever it is I had him in there for not doing (ie: eating his dinner!). most times he's in there for less than a minute before he comes out with kisses and apologies for everyone... ]]> Mon, 04 Apr 2011 19:38:18 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1299493&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1299493 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1298125&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1298125 Author: sarasal
Subject: 38382
Posted: 02 April 2011 at 4:14pm

funny, I was trying to give mine away last week too! Mine is still an only child - but he's suddenly reached the jealous stage & he can't stand sharing anything with the kids at playgroups, so it will be interesting to see how he copes with a new baby.
We hardly ever use any kind of punishment but if he hits, he goes in the naughty chair for 2 minutes. I face him to the wall and just hold him there from behind with my arms around him as he won't stay on his own. It seems to work but he gets really upset. He gets a hug afterwards.
]]> Sat, 02 Apr 2011 16:14:06 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1298125&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1298125 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1288020&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1288020 Author: Bizzy
Subject: 38382
Posted: 18 March 2011 at 4:08pm

putting them in time out isnt just about giving them a boring place to be - its taking them away from you and your attention. if it were me i would put him in his room when he hits her, so what if he is playing in there.   eventually he will get sick of missing out on you so often. so long as you explain why he was in there and give him some options and examples of good playing.]]> Fri, 18 Mar 2011 16:08:17 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1288020&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1288020 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1287905&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1287905 Author: SpecialK
Subject: 38382
Posted: 18 March 2011 at 1:31pm

I feel your pain, it's so tough sometimes.

Ummm, no real words of wisdom here - we do use time out - we have a naughty corner. We count to three - Nigel Latta's technique. Actually, Nigel Latta's book Politically Incorrect parenting has been awesome, really worth a read if you haven't already. I also don't bother with lengthy explanations - just "no" or "don't hit her". Mine are a bit younger than yours though...

Good luck, hope things settle down for you. ]]> Fri, 18 Mar 2011 13:31:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1287905&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1287905 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1285699&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1285699 Author: notenufchaos
Subject: 38382
Posted: 15 March 2011 at 3:38pm

i initially had the same thought you did regarding time out in their bedroom being fun - HOWEVER after reading diane levy's of course i love you now go to your room, i use it all the time - its not about punishment really its bout giving them time to think about their behaviour i use 2 minutes increments so she goes in for two minutes i go in ask if she is ready to play nice and apologise if the answer is no then i close the door - even if she is in her room playing with her toys she is not hurting her sister and is having some much needed space. so until she can say to me that she is ready to come out and play nice then she stays in her room. Also she tells me when her sister is annoying her and if she is playing in the lounge then i tell her if she doesnt want to play with her sister she has to go into her room to play otherwise she has to share. sorry hope that makes a little sense]]> Tue, 15 Mar 2011 15:38:56 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1285699&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1285699 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284566&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284566 Author: MissAngel
Subject: 38382
Posted: 14 March 2011 at 7:24am

I wont put him in his room for time out, his room is a fun place with lots to do! We've tried the 'naughty seat' but good luck getting him to stay on it - I know you're sposed to start from the beginning when they get off - we'd honestly be there all day! No amount of explanation to him about it makes him stay there.
Yesterday I even had to put the baby away so Thomas wouldnt hurt her. I was also told yesterday by my 28 year old sister that i've become that mum that yells at her kids all the time. Its it any bloody wonder? Hell, what do you do after you've tried speaking to them calmly all day and they just dont listen.
This 'phase' better piss off soon, it's really making a strain on the rest of us!
At least my husband understands what i'm going on about now - I made him watch the kids yesterday afternoon. lol. He doesnt want to do that again. ]]> Mon, 14 Mar 2011 07:24:30 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284566&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284566 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284519&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284519 Author: mrsbt
Subject: 38382
Posted: 13 March 2011 at 10:13pm

Man, I know what you are going through. Some things that have helped a little though not completely fixed it, in our home are:
My 3yo goes straight to time out if he screams at or hits his brother (2yo). At first I even had to hold the door closed while he was in time out in his room. While he is in time out I give his brother attention. When I bring him out again he has to apologise and I continue attention on 2yo for a little longer.
I have been working hard at getting my 3yo to stop and speak his frustration. Usually he is mad at his brother cause said brother stole a toy. I have been insisting 3yo stops and asks his brother for toy back. When he starts to scream because a toy is taken I call out his name until he stops and say "What do you need to do?" He now has got to a point where he turns and asks his brother. I then I have to insist brother gives the toy back... :-) It is impressive to see how far he has come but it is still far from perfect...
If he likes to play on his own then you could try setting him up in his room with door closed so his younger sibling can't get to him.
I have also put strong limits on certain toys so each boy has toys that belong to only them and their brother is NOT allowed to touch.

Hang in there, they say it is a phase....

I just realised your second is quite a bit younger. Sorry some of this might not apply. I would encourage you to give him a space that your daughter can't get to so he can play without her touching everything. Also try and talk through with him what he can do if he is feeling mad at his sister and say "I love you" loads...

Edited by mrsbt]]> Sun, 13 Mar 2011 22:13:23 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284519&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284519 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284345&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284345 Author: JoJames
Subject: 38382
Posted: 13 March 2011 at 6:42pm

It does suck. I've taught James to "ask" (demand) me to take lewis away rather than hitting Lewis, and it does seem to be better, the only problem is that if he asks me I have to do it right away cause I think he does it more if I'm consistent. also he will go up to lewis playing sit dowm by him and then ask me to take lewis away, which I don't. when he does hit lewis a lot of the time he is just getting a little overexcited or tired or needs to let out some energy, so I send him to his room so he can have some time out, I'm hoping that they will soon play well together]]> Sun, 13 Mar 2011 18:42:54 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284345&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284345 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284314&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284314 Author: Shezamumof3
Subject: 38382
Posted: 13 March 2011 at 5:23pm

DS is the same Alex, he really hurts his sister sometimes, pushes her hits her, hits her with toys, slaps her but he is getting better, its just the age they are at and some are worse than others, DS is quite bad!

But, DD gets her own back now!

I just tell him off(and her if she does the same to him), he gets put in his room and told off, and I just get really tough if he packs a wobbly and wont stay in there, I keep putting him back every time. ]]> Sun, 13 Mar 2011 17:23:48 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284314&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284314 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284152&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284152 Author: caliandjack
Subject: 38382
Posted: 13 March 2011 at 11:31am

Sorry Miss Angel don't know that there is much you can do apart from play referee my brother is of a similar age gap older than me and we fort continuously from the day I was born till he left home. Good Luck. ]]> Sun, 13 Mar 2011 11:31:34 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284152&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284152 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284133&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284133 Author: Emmecat
Subject: 38382
Posted: 13 March 2011 at 10:29am

Can't say much except that I feel your pain! ]]> Sun, 13 Mar 2011 10:29:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284133&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284133 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284063&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284063 Author: MissAngel
Subject: 38382
Posted: 13 March 2011 at 7:17am

Honestly, i've had it up to the eyebrows with Thomas at the moment. Not only is he a typical male with painted on ears, he's now started hurting his sister.
He's always been jealous of Lily - that's a natural thing when you're not the only child any-more of course! But she just loves him so much and wants to play with him all the time, but he wont have a bar of it.
We started out with him yelling at her to go away, progressed to him pushing her away, then pushing her over/throwing heavy toys at her. Over the last 2 days he's taken to finding a noisy toy, pressing a button on it which of course attracts her over.. she comes to see what it's all about and he hits her HARD. I've since taken all of his toys away - we've tried all the difference discipline methods, doesn't work.. Do you think anyone would complain if I tied him up outside? :P :P :P Oh god.. what do I do with him!?
He goes to pre-school 4 days a week, so they're not in each others faces all the time. He gets up first in the morning so he's got my attention for most of the time. Its not like he's being treated any different.

Having to constantly watch what he's doing in case he really hurts his sister is taking it out of me. Last night I even caught him climbing into her cot ffs! I'm honestly about to give up. I really am. ]]> Sun, 13 Mar 2011 07:17:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38382&PID=1284063&title=anyone-want-a-free-toddler#1284063